i mistaked the back of her knee for her vagina
There's a woman here that looks like a cross between Michael Jackson and Flipper.
Just kissed her with a dip in my mouth... She was either too drunk to notice or too cool to care
I just found 22 drunken videos and 4 naked pictures on my phone. We'll start the bidding at $5
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Why does everyone think all I do is drink? I go to class on wednesdays
Just made gatorade. in the bathtub.
Just ate applesauce I laced with percocets for dinner. I'm pretty sure my grandmother does the same thing.
Birthday was great, I got entirely too drunk and made really poor life decisions. It was everything a birthday should be.
what the fuck a piece of candy corn just came out of her nose
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
you are going to have to live with the consequences, i'm going to fuck your sister
I'm rearranging all my life goals to become a billionaire by 28 and batman by 30. Not kidding.
That is NOT what pussyfooting around means. Try that again with your toe and I break it off.
Thanks for the bagel and the sex.
Did I seriously answer the door for a home delivery of weed from you and your boss while wearing last night's 80s rockstar face paint?
tell me about the eggs
Randomize