We hit a deer, sort of a buzz kill. But it's fine.
boyfriend complimented me on my new prada shoes today. he is officially either gay or the man im gonna marry. knowing my luck it's all of the above.
I puked off the balcony.
Not horrible
Into the hottub. There were six people in it. I had eaten all their pizza.
I decided that just having that story under my belt and being able to tell it to my grandchildren is worth the regrets of the evening.
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shut up i haven't hooked up with anyone since 45 minutes ago
Nothing says I've got my life together like buying a jumbo bottle of 7$ wine in sweat pants on a monday night
I got Green Bay stickers to put on my nipples. This way when I flash it will look like I did it out of spirit as opposed to drunkenness
It looks alright. The blow up doll is in the microwave, and she has forks in her ass
So burnt out. Like weed hangover. And someone just fell through the ceiling outside of my class. How's your morning going?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Come on. I'll make you hot pockets. Literally and sexually.
Thanks to you and Ketel One I now have a court summons with the actual word "frolicking" on it.
Plus he stuck it in when you were sleeping which would have been the tipping point for me but you art school kids are all liberal and shit
I don't remember much and some girl almost convinced me to jump off the bridge while she held my stuff...
Yeah it got awkward when the two guys we were playing beer pong against realized that I'd hooked up with both of them. Their teamwork declined after that.
We gotta locate my vibrators and get them stashed away STAT
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