Really? You have stories that rival having a threesome with the two best friends of the guy your kinda seeing? Thats impressive.
btw.sex in the wood isnt as romantic as it seems.heels kept sinking in the dirt and pine needles were sticking to the fishnets
i wish i had your life
Fun fact of the day the average american will consume 13248 beers in their lifetime.
So for us it's double that?
Precisely.
Someone just proposed in Subway. Trying not to laugh.
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he just told me i make him happier than drugs. that's some serious shit right there
You grinded on me in Jimmy johns to a madonna song.
He equated my biology degree to a belief in Santa. I wonder if he heard the doors to my vagina clanging shut.
I can't believe you picked a finger in the ass over lunch with me.
I just had sex over my oven then high fived the guy. It's going to be a good year.
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How long can I keep it classy to hook up in my old office building? Two more years? Does it get weird after 30?
We had sex in the church bell tower and somehow it still feels right.
This is even better than the wine from my laundry basket
I’m literally watching say yes to the dress, eating fancy cheeses with crackers, and I have orange dark chocolates. All of which is being washed down with merlot. And I’m 100% sure a porno is gonna go down next door tonight. They don’t have a car and arrived via taxi. Happy holidays from motel 6 Pendleton Oregon!
Last thing I remember I was riding on a picnic table being hauled around by a lawn mower with an empty case of bud light on my head...
Ladies night is a gift from god. If it weren't for that, I'd probably be selling my eggs for booze money.
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