I had a dream last night where you were a transsexual in a low cut blue dress with lovely long brown hair. You were very pretty. I hope you are well.
he kept bringing up different times we had sex and i wouldnt say anything back. i would never confirm nor deny the situation...like a politician ya kno
Well, technically I had a shirt on, it was just around my waist.
I just woke up at my desk with "To Whommmmmmmmm" typed on a letter. I have no memory of waking up, getting dressed or driving in.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Will you come get her? She's trying to get the pizza guy into the bathtub.
She made me go down the fire escape when her mom came for breakfast.
We literaly had to peel your fingers off the jose cuervo bottle and lock it in someones room
Have invented new cocktail. Any flavor of crystal light and vodka. I call it "I am going to die alone"
I'm that hungover student in class ... On a wednesday morning
Omg I think I'm in the wrong class
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She acts like a 3 year old but with fantastic tits. This girl is the reason women are objectified
Obama's speech on in 9 mins. Me in the shower now. Naked. Make your choice.
I'm bringing the tv in with me.
I just feel like everything is too perfect
He's probably a serial killer or chronic masturbator
Or both. Which is common
The date officially concluded on the phrase "Nosh dat vag".
Everyone is out there getting real jobs and I just realized I've been "washing" my clothes with fabric softener for two months.
I just tried to dye my pubic hair teal for her
Randomize