I JUST GOT MY PERIOD AND MY VISA FOR LONDON GOT APPROVED! BEST DAY EVER!
he wanted to give me a nickname... my choices were superjugs,godzilla boobs or mouth of fury
Dry humping a girl for an hour and then jizzing in your pants doesn't count as losing it.
I just wanted to say sorry for trying to jack off your dog last night.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
the sex was "jacking off to playboy" bad.
I dont know why the TSA people are looking at me wierd. I mean there is no way i am the only hungover college girl here with nine tally marks on her hand and last nights glitter on her face
I thought my period ended but I felt it again as soon as Pitbull started playing
The bottle of Jameson may have been a bit aggressive for a Sunday cookout.
I'm wearing fairy wings and I broke my wizard staff. If this isn't the most happy but sad moment of my life , I don't know what is.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just shotgunned a beer and my lipstic didnt BUDGE. MERICUHH
Last night apparently I said "I need a break" and then I just passed the fuck out for 3 hours
I didn't know I was invited to an orgy.
BOOM BITCH SERVES YOU RIGHT I HOPE YOU SHIT YOURSELF PETER PAN
Well, I currently have zero fuckboys and my vibrator just broke. A fresh start to May.
New goal find someone I love enough to use these Japanese pancake flavored condoms on
Randomize