Her life must suck. All she's got is "Miss Shamrock" WHICH SHE LOST!
I am wasted and people are fist pumping. This should not happen on the west coast.
I was just stopped at a stop sign waiting for the moon to turn green.
Had sex and ran 2.8 miles all before 7:30am. This is going to be a very productive Monday.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you took a potato out of your pocket and just started eating it raw. don't know where the potato came from though
21st birthday = success
Nice. The Governor's son bruised my vagina.
That's going to be the title of my memoir.
I spent $31 at mcdonalds last night. Threw my nuggets all over the yard, ate them out of the snow, picked a fight about it, vomited, then passed out.
Naked.
10/10 dentists agree that he is one bangable mother fucker. hint: i am all of these dentists.
He FaceTimed me fucking his new girlfriend. He was wearing a banana costume.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Should probably stop going into the gas station to look for the most normal person to hitch a ride with to drive me to a party
when you wake up naked in a bed with glowsticks, a rolled ankle, a hangover, and a condom; alone. you wonder shit
I'm glad we smoked together,that was probs the biggest sibling bonding we will ever have.
Blacking out in the security line at the airport is not nearly as fun as blacking out in the lunch line at the dining hall.
Is it weird that I shop for lingerie by thinking if it will look good on both me and your floor?
No. Not at all.
There's even glitter on my cock...
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