I just went through her cupboards. Eye patch and sword. nowhere near each other. different shelfs.
I thought if I stared at him long enough he'd walk me to my car. but he didn't. he dddidn't. i rreally thought i had those powers.
She asked the class if starwars was based on a true story...
sometimes i think i'm bisexual but then i realize the only girl i'm attracted to is myself.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
His room was full of guns. It was like having sex with Clint Eastwood.
You were humming mission impossible as we ran from the cops
I'm in Starbucks carrying the boxes wine and the hubcap. So many judging looks.
Yah at one point i was listening to metallica and doing pushups last night. I went thru alot of emotions.
Just think of your bundle of joy thats on its way. And how hes gunna rip your vagina apart
Die.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just FYI, by the transitive property my breasts have now touched the Stanley Cup.
Dude so last night I was eating out my gf and her kitten climbed onto my back and fell asleep. AND SHE DIDN'T NOTICE FOR LIKE 10 MINUTES
also i don't know what you guys ate last night but he broke the toilet
My boobs are hoarders, they steal food and hide it. Greedy bitches.
Hold on I'll be right there, I can't find my arm.
The bar brought brought it upon themselves, they played billy joels piano man before closing, it's not our fault the bar isn't a bar anymore, right?
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