shaved balls and baby powder=awesome
Kirsten Dunst is sitting next to me in a bar in NYC
Tell her I want my money back for Elizabethtown.
I hope whoever gets these locks of love doesn't have a drug test anytime soon
So gin and wine won't be happening again
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Don't worry we did the "promise to get an abortion" handshake
He looked down at his phone and screamed "I'M NOT A DAD!" and then bought the entire bar a round
We need more drag queens in our life I've decided
in the middle of getting head my cat meowed. she looked up , meowed back, and then continued giving me head.
Didn't want to waste the cheese dust from the white cheddar popcorn, so I gave him a handjob, followed by the most delicious blowjob ever. Win-win.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Sally, Your mom and my mom hooked up in college, we must uphold this tradition.
And now to play every stoner's favorite game: Where the Fuck Did We Park the Car?! Disneyland Edition!
As much of a hooker as I am you don't slam where you drink
Pretty sure I just scored Election Day sex based on the theory that if either of these fools win the world as we know it is over so we might as well get a few orgasms in...
Wow dude wow that's sad man so sad. I dno't event wanna massturbate anymore due to teh sadness
U dont jog and buy condoms n bulk
Randomize