did you get engaged???
she used her cellphone as a light to find my clit under the sheets. worst.lesbian.ever.
I pretty much just threw a bunch of clothes and my vodka in a bag..idk where I'm gonna end up tonight but I'm prepared.
She wants to practice her harmonica skills on my penis
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You can drink as much as you want but it's not gunna make her forehead any smaller
I was hoping it might at least fix her teeth
It was fun, but I mean, any day that starts with shower tequila is bound to be good.
Sounds good. I will just get tanked here and wear this batman mask.
I just found out via Facebook that my old dorm room is now the free condom distribution room on campus...IT'S LIKE THE UNIVERSE KNOWS!
If we could give a gymnastic score to drunken nights, I would be a part of the Fab Five.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I AM VODKA MAN
OMFG "ASS" JUST STARTED PLAYING ON MY PHONE VIA PANDORA AS IM IN THE CAR WITH A CONGRESSMAN FUCKKKK
I love the fact that my Mom has been present at 90% of my drug deals.
My new boobs got me 12 drinks at the concert. Whose the real winner here?
The first thing you did was give us a tour of the house and showed us who was "on-limits" and "off-limits"
we found her. shes in the bathtub full of raw pasta. i dont even know...
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