I want a vodka facial right about now. I'm talking about straight vodka bukkake
i am literally watching eva make a trashbag diaper for you to sleep in tonight. whole new level of low for you.
But besides the pee thing, he sounds like a nice guy.
Just heard the girl at the bar cuss her bf out and order a long island ice tea. Going to give it 5 min then I'm going in. See you on the other side.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Me too it's so nice. Debated studying out there but woulda been 90% babe-watching 5% flexing 3% studying and 2% talkin my boners down.
Just made a jeopardy bj game. Every question has 10-50 seconds on it and if he's right that's how many he gets.
I don't know whether to call the hospital or call the prison first.
Well, I made it thru a doorway, so I think things are going good.
Let's hurry up so I can puke at home instead of my van
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He lit a candle for the mood and ended up lighting my hair on fire while we were hooking up...moodkiller
i'm gonna crowd surf you onto his dick
I'm only coming over if you have cocaine or a snickers bar
The walk of shame was so much longer today. i have to start fucking guys in my own postcode.
I think I recall josh coming in to the room to tuck us in and give us a few condoms and I threw them back all furious and told him 'we don't use those.' Oh god
After returning from the hospital with lock-jaw from getting tackle at the game. Some naked chick busted out of his room and hit him with a devastating haymaker to the jaw because he wouldn't have sex
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