someone get that fucking seahorse.
the entire time we were hooking up i couldn't stop thinking about the bengals. thoughts?
How far into the semester do we have to be before it's ok to get drunk in between classes again?
so all the bums hang out by my new store, they have a leader we call king bum... He got dethroned by police today for choking out a hooker. The bum heirarchy is in shambles right now.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Can't wait to go see my drug dealers baby being born. He rolled all of the "it's a boy" cigars into blunts.
I love that the power of margaritas brought us back together.
Get to the bar. Power hour leading up to the rapture.
I think I just inadvertently started a sex competition with my roommate and her boyfriend.
High school girls are buying me shots. This will not end well.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You know i'm the father figure
Yeah the father who ate her out with me last night. Great dad
He's writing a strongly worded email to Trojan right now
I TOLD YOU THE BARESKIN CONDOMS WEREN'T AS RELIABLE.
My mom just told me she would flash her tits to a cop to get me out of jail, and then we high-fived.
Now all I have unanswered questions and a fucked up finger
He took my Spanx off and still fucked me twice. I call that success.
Where do you think your fantastically immense lady-boner for men in uniform comes from?
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