I found your undies. They were wrapped around my leg.
Drunk in some girls audi what the fuck is happenin i love sb
it's ELEVEN
thirty
Going to a jewelry store high is not a good idea. I look like mr.t's wife.
I can hear my fat mexican neighbor yelling "do you like that!" ...I hope its not his dog
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Even My mom was ashamed of me bringing her home, she pulled me aside, and told me i can do better than, "butter faces"
Definitely got drunk and sent her a literal picture of my asshole. I titled it " you"
Just had such a rough shit, don't stop believin had to be played
He wasn't eating out, he was performing a hysterectomy without a license....should I be worried about my future family?
I just want a guy that likes cats and is willing to get a vasectomy. IS THAT SO MUCH TO ASK?!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm sitting outside your room listening for sex noises eating pepperoni...slowly
People are talking politics and I have had 9 mimosas
Jesus Christ. Even your cock has to be an overachiever. :-(
I woke up in his closet, with my shirt inside out and backwards, Rolos in my hand, a tortilla with a face carved into it stuck to the fridge with a magnet, a homemade bong next to the bed, and the door off the hinges... I need a chaperone.
what happened last night?!
you took a shot and then laid down on our kitchen table and passed out.. then when we tried to move you to the couch you screamed "no! i love tables"
He woke up and decided to go for a swim in the lake... At about 3am... With his dogs
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