Next time, if you wake and bake, make sure you nail the wake part. Not easy to explain to mum. Or the fire brigade.
Hold on, I'm google imaging "vagina close ups" to see if mine match up
I look like a sausage in jean shorts, you should have woken up earlier and approved my outfit.
he's speaking broken english and calling me isaac.. this is not the australian i ordered for a one nighter
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Note to self. Don't order a $10 bottle of wine on a 40 min flight because it seems like a good deal.
God you're perfect.
I am. So drunk right now. Good work, Frontier.
It's like an R Kelly music video in here. Only a matter of time before someone pisses on someone
I told him to pick up the beer can he threw in front of the police station. So he gets out chugs whatever's left and throws it back and says ok let's go.
Oh god. Just tried to hail a pizza delivery car. Awkward.
International sake day = success
You just wrote a check for drugs...pretty sure you don't have cash for beer..
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Like theyre better than no shoes. I'm sitting her balls naked playing xbox in nothing but crocs with the fur
our friendships a beautiful delicate flower...that has been crushed by peni
Dude, where are you?
In back
of car
... whose car?
Holy Hangover.. I'm marrying whoever put this water by my bed
You told his date she had the tits to be a stripper and the personality to be the pole. Of course he's pissed off.
I didn't even know his name until he texted me the next day and told me I should take a plan B pill. Thanks Danny.
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