how did your night go?
he asked for my myspace name.
I just saw a hobo shake a payphone until it spat out a bunch of quarters. what a champ.
Marriage: a sacred union between one man and one woman, and another woman in Argentina.
Packing up everything in the dorm. Silly bands to unused condom ratio is ridiculous.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Like that girl needs to get her shit together. For her vagina's sake.
i had to take off my light up shamrock necklaces, my professor was getting suspicious.
Ps. I feel like I may pee myself this weekend. Either drunkenly or out of excitement. Toss up
It was fun until the stripper told me it was her first day and started crying.
Plus, it's just valuable. Virgin pee is very well-priced.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I don't think I'm allowed to have Burger King. What if i just chew for taste and not actually consume. Like a wine connoisseur for fast food
I really should have gone with the man who kept offering me cocaine. Why did I chose the German!? STUPID!
We should buy t shirt guns and blow eggs out of them at his house. Bachelorette party
I'm not over that dildo rifle story. I don't think I ever will be.
My friends said as soon as you walked in, I motor boated you like there was no tomorrow.
Yeah, I liked it.
Dude, the worst part is I can't even pretend it didn't happen because she posted a video of it on Facebook.
Randomize