yeah well you didnt even puke from the alcohol. we cut you off and went to huck finn's and told you that the "irish cream" coffee creamers had baileys in it, so you shot down like eight of them and puked all over the floor. it was great. we cheered you on and everything
Its already bleeding so dont be alarmed after you bite it
this is something i pride myself on being below average for
These headphones make me feel like I'm sitting on John Mayers lap and he's singing just to me. I picture like a pitch black room with a single spotlight on us. Also, convinced Kyle to give me percocet soo.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I actually want to hang out with her with our clothes on. That's a big step up for me.
4 months of living in europe has taught me the art of making a drunken stumble look like a dance move
Delete her number from his phone. He keeps slurring how he's going to get her "all sorts of pregnant".
Note to self don't give these guys your number. I've seen more dick tonight than a proctologist sees his whole career
New drinking game: Drink while you Drink. I'll explain the rules when I see you, needless to say, it's not difficult. Unless you enjoy sobriety, humanity and life. Bestest.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Ever wonder what all the drugs you've ever done would look like put together?
Heaven. . It would look like heaven
i don't know man... i just want to listen to John Lennon every time i finish fucking her. is this love?
I think my dove chocolate wrapper just told me to masturbate.
Don't drink and shop. I went for happy hour and came home with a fog machine. I now have no other choice but to scare the shit out of my neighbors with it.
George disappeared two hours ago with a stripper named "delicious." Haven't seen him since
He texts me "just to say hi" and then tells me how hard he is and sends me a dick pic. And I'm like, dude, I'm ordering a burrito right now
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