so my class lasted 15 minutes this morning because this kid puked all over himself..only at radford
herpes texted me again. he says he wants my vagina.
ok we should really consider changing this guys nickname...
I will cut you
Oddly enough thats the second time today someones said that to me
Put that in perspective
I need a therapist, but moreover we are going to be really drunk.
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The dopest dose you'll ever dose. I felt like an octopus all of thursday
Just turned your apartment into a democracy and were voting on who takes shots next
So how did it go?
I'm not sure if it was all the eggnog or all the alcohol, but hosting an eggnog pong tournament was a mistake.
Do you remember making out with the dude in the back of my cab last night?? You said his mustache tickled your tongue.
Some small part of me hopes I'm on the probationary list because of seeing the Dean at that fetish party.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He came all over her clothes we have to leave
I don't need this shit right now. I just woke up covered in pistachios
You know it's a pretty bad night when an injured penis is not the worst thing that happened to you. Fuck tequila
I mean, I was expecting a little more coke snorting and a little less kids and cake
It's very disconcerting to wake up and she is gone. I never know where she could be. It's like playing wheres Waldo but Waldo could potentially be drunk and wandering around in weird places that normal Waldo's don't go.
So...I'm pretty sure I have officially determined that reverse cowgirl is the only position possible to have sex in my smart four two
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