good. and stop kissing my girl you dirty slut.
i don't think she's still your girl..plus, she kept screaming "kiss me! i'm a lesbian!" last night so i think you're outta luck..
I'm way too drunk on a Sunday to handle this level of Jesus.
I have seen more male genitalia at this party tonight than I ever want to see again in my entire life.
I was actually high enough at that point that I was just casually following your glowing footsteps like in Avatar while we ran from the cops.
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He gets creativity points for the hot sauce. But it may be awhile until my nipples forgive him
you told that cab driver that when the 3 of us come togehter it means happiness and love
Her eyebrows were plucked so thin that she had to have gonorrhea. Clean girls just don't pluck that way
Last I remember we played rock paper scissors for who would fuck the guy with cowboy boots on and I won..
He keeps texting me videos of fish swimming in his fish tank, so I think it's safe to say he's back on weed.
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I don't like sad things. I do like drinking though
why am i naked
you took off your clothes at the party and some guy took them home
I saw the attitude and didn't even try. Line of the night from one guy who talked with them for a while said, "I don't meet you standards. I have a job and would treat you well." She was blank faced.
I just turned down a booty call because I'm having a Star Wars movie marathon
He screamed, "Let there be light!" when he came
She was drunk running in the middle of the street when a cop saw her,picked her up and dropped her off at her house. This really doesn't surprise me.
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