sunday morning discovery: something purple, smelly, and sticky my hair. any suggestions?
I apparently tried to stop my spending of money by sealing the top of my wallet with gum
someone put bongwater in my humidifier again THIS NEEDS TO STOP
She liked every single Facebook status in her newsfeed and then made her status 'I LIKE U GUYS'
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Do you need a place to sleep? Cause I fucked in the guestroom a few weeks ago and never washed the sheets. But if you don't care neither do I.
I can't wait to find out the true size of his penis! Please maintain enough sobriety for an accurate report.
I hope to God 2011 is the year I stop loving tequila.
To put it in a frame of reference with which you're familiar, it was like making out with a golden retriever.
Anything you tell me within three minutes of an orgasm isn't even being recorded in my head.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
All three roommates are gay and in women's studies. Ive already been informed that all penetration is rape. This is not the college experience I signed up for.
His reasoning for leaving the keys in the ignition of my car overnight with the top down in an open parking lot ? Too eager to have sex. The sex was not that good for him to do this twice....
who orders an old fashioned in 2014? even my Grandparents think you're an asshole.
WEED BROWNIES! He put weed in my brownie mix! And he got it from YYYYOOOOUUUU!
Look at the bright side mom. After 20 years dad is still capable of surprising you!
Shut up Max.
My orgasm happened in two different decades
I’m tired of his bullshit and premature ejaculation. I’m going to hotel bars and finding a guy who is DTF
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