im so drunk with asians
where?
always
just gave a yankee's fan wrong directions to Fenway....welcome to boston asshole
I went up to get a drink from the hotel room. And ended up getting arrested in the lobby. Spring break has not been forgiving this year.
He asked me if we could throw a lingerie party together so I guess he's single again
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So I passed out with my boxers on in the hotel jacuzzi at 5am.. The manager who kicked me out was pretty cute so I left my name and number for her at the front desk. I'm giving it a 50/50 she calls.
there's no excuse to just assume your pants won't be coming off for some reason or another. that's just irresponsible
I looked up while we were having sex to see him covering my pillow pet's eyes with his free hand. I think I'm in love
Wow just saw this. Nothing like a little anal sex to ring in 2012.
And now she's hand feeding me pork rines and showing me her angry birds high scores. This is Vegas.
He rode a broom down the stairs while we were mattress surfing. Naked. Buck ass naked. WTF
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
And as cleavage season comes to a close, so blooms a new season of yoga pants. And the people rejoiced.
Well, I'm hung over and my penis hurts - two signs of success
We broke up. And I told him he better give me my fucking star wars movies tomorrow. Priorities.
I apologize that you just fell victim to my random thought of how to make a blow job come to life via emojis.
His dick is the size of my forearm. Would it be rude to ask to take a comparison photo after sex?
Make me food? I don't want to be a science experiment. I'm dunk. Holy shit. Drunk*. Let's do science.
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