I forgot to tell you. I'm at a porno shoot today.
i asked him to tell me something nice and he said "your vagina is really tight."
why does my vagina smell like weed?
omg thats a great idea
At least you're going to bed with all the teeth you woke up with
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i was blowing him and "what if god was one of us" came on his playlist. I had to leave
What I thought it would be sexy pouring melted chocolate down here chest, ended up in second degree burns. Hot food and sex do not mix.
it's like heaven, but drunker
I baptized my dog in my pool last night because he snapped at my party guests, how was your night?
And I'm not sure if that's how you pluralize penis. Never planned on needing to know that in my life.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I would convert to being a Republican and Mormon just to sleep with Romney's sons. The things I would to do them.
Oh, also as a concerning side note, my bra had drops of blood on it. So I don't know what the deal was, but someone I was around was definitely bleeding a decent amount.
Currently playing charity bingo with coworkers so if u were ever gonna send a dick pic now is the time
The only monogamous relationship I can keep is with my eyebrow lady...
He says the sweetest things but also that he wants to choke me when we fuck so it's kinda perfect.
I just dropped a chicken nugget on the floor and seriously prayed that it would be ok....I think this job is making me crazy.
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