Do you remember last night at all? Be honest
I need to look at the pictures on my camera to fill in the gaps.
Question: Is it too early to claim April Fools on the text "can we do some lines before the concert" that I accidentally sent Mom?
Just found a "how to get laid" book on the dresser and am now a victim of method number 16 corollary 7.
Since when does sleeping with your RA not result in free meal swipes? I feel so tricked...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He just made me apologize because his morning wood is NOT a laughing matter.
Just so you know you don't have to worry about me picking up any guys tonight. The Hilton is hosting guests from the North American Gay Volleyball Association and the Comic Palooza
Ok wear gym clothes just in case we feel like going shitfaced to the gym
Found a fruit roll up in my pocket this morning. This means my daughter has a peach blunt wrap in her lunchbox.
I think it really helped to be hungover at accepted students day. it gave me a good feel for how it would be everyday if I go there.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Lets just say my thoughts when getting dressed this morning was "vagina friendly" options
You said too many real things and now I need to crawl back inside my protective fort of sarcasm, being an asshole, and sass
So my balls are accidently making an appearance on snapchat
I feel like any time there's that much rope, lingerie, and horse masks on the ground, it's safe to say it was a great night
I wrote him a note at the end of the final. I'm hoping I can flirt my way in to an A or B
Dude this weed has me so paranoid.
Yeah tell me about it I just screamed after I coughed because my own cough scared me.
Randomize