Come get meeee. I'm stranded in the middle of no where with Paul (?). I think u puked on his friend.
honestly if we didnt hate the same people we would have a friendship based on nothing
The girl next to me in class is taking notes on woman's suffrage with a girls gone wild pen.
you were on all fours yelling at the earth to stop spinning.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I made $300 today by selling pizza @ $4 a slice to nerds who refuse to leave the library. God I love finals time
She kept saying "I'm going to hell" the entire time we were fucking. I really wasn't sure what to do... so I agreed with her.
That was definitely the right answer.
I wonder what a non-hungover friday at work is like
A-plus on my thesis. I deserve the blowjob to end all blowjobs. And I wanna wear a crown while you do it.
You kept showing everyone at the bar your bra to prove it matched your shoes.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just got back to our room ....neither of us spent the night there but both our beds are occupied. send help.
Honestly and this might sound scary... But I want to get high and play with weapons
Shirley Temple died. We owe it to her to get dirty shirley wasted.
Yay! Also. When you're coming down eat waffles and touch yourself. You won't regret it.
Opened my notebook to coke all over the pages. So, if that's any indication on how this weekend went.
Promise me if ever I think I can't do anything, remind me that I waxed my own butthole
Randomize