Hey, kurt drew a penis on you and wrote my innotals. I had nothing to do a/ that.
Tickle wars 95% of the time end in sex.
soo I had sex last night and he wore a condom, pulled out sans condom. we looked everywhere and couldnt find it, even in my vag. so Im in the library at school and I googled it and it gave me "gentle digging" techniques, and sure enough, found it. ew. I'll be purchasing Plan B after class.
I'm eating tomato paste and drinking banana juice that is expired. Can we please get groceries tonight?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
she uses eco-friendly sex toys. she is the literal definition of a hippie.
At what point in your drunken state would you actually believe that the cops wanted to party with you?
I can't be 100% sure of this but I think tonight was the first time I told a middle aged woman holding a baby to go fuck herself
I think drinking everclear was a better idea than taking a night class.
It was his first time doing shrooms and we made him ride in the truck bed. But he kept standing up and yelling when we stopped so we had to keep driving
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
At some point you realize they're vacuuming and you still have to sober up. Please find me a boyfriend thanks .
Got a handy at the foam party. Took girl home. Banged her. Thanked her for foam handy. "what handy?"
It's a lube slip n slide down the hallway now. Details later.
I had sex with him and I blame the Doritos
I don't even care that it's before church. I feel like God actually wants me to have this shower beer.
Well, I turned down sex again. This is guy #5 in the past 2 weeks. My vagina is going to seek emancipation.
Randomize