Don't make me choose between a good grade and anal
There was a picture of him proposing on the night stand and their dog watched, but I can't help myself, his dick is just so perfect.
I couldn't sleep so I drunk ellipticaled for an hour. Worst. Idea. Ever.
Just witnessed a bar fight started by a guy wearing a construction vest cuz he didn't like the other guys shirt
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Oh, I never thought you were a dick. You were one of the best morally comprised ideas I've ever had.
There is blood on the door to my room, I have to go to sleep
do you want me to tag you in the pics from the party?
Hmm. Use your judgment. Bootlicking pics are probably not ok. Otherwise fine.
Not genetic. He's drunk and texted me a dick pic. Not genetic. Thank God!
I've been called an asshole for a lot of things in my life, but I never thought it would be because of potatoes
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I've seen you dance and let's just say its a good thing you don't have a small dick
I feel like there should be a 'roommate information section' of the paperwork when there's a chance you'll be given pain killers.
She said she didn't feel right fucking on her parents dining room table I grabbed the only thing around bubblewrap she blew me for creativity
They pay me enough to pretend to be either helpful, or heterosexual. If they want both I need one hell of a raise.
This is why people in Buffalo die of heart attacks. This and wings
Okay, this next statement may sound like a red flag but I'm tellin you, shotgunning those two beers really helped me love my child more effectively. Honest.
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