I've slept with so many tools that you'd think my pussy was Home Depot.
Hooked up with my old baby sitter last night, so what do I do? As I was sucking her tits I decided it would be a good idea to say " goo goo gah gah"....it wasn't a good idea.
it will be a sad day when drinking racks of keystone isnt socially acceptable anymore
Just took 11th shot of tequila. I may puke in my bear head.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I no longer see him as a simple set of male genitalia attached to a very sexy body. The title "trophy fuck" seems wrong. Damn.
I was at that stage of drunk where it seemed appropriate to just make out with everyone. As like a greeting.
I hear you
YES. YOU ARE GOING TO HAVE SEX WITH ME WHILE I SING LES MIS.
Word of advice, don't put your jar if peanut butter in the microwave, blue fire comes out
Birthday are for suffering. TAke some tylenol pm and day-drink tomorrow
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's 4/20. I'm not too worried about "healthy"
I threw up in my closet when I was hammered last night. Like a fucking toddler. I can't play with the grow ups.
Holy shit, I wanna ride him into the horizon.
I will run into the sunset with a fist full of condoms.
she said that no one there was hot enough for her so she then proceeded to give the passed out person a lap dance because he was "her type."
He showed up completely drunk with a 30 of PBR and ten cans of Spam. I like this kid.
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