i was just outside smoking and i saw a hooker sing "i wish i knew who your daddy was" to her new born baby. someone explain to me why i ever left chicago to go to college...
We just walked into this party and immediately got handed a grilled cheese sandwhich....
I truly believe that the solid foundation of any healthy relationship is a drunken one night stand so I can just get all the nasty shit out on the table
bad decision 37: pregaming the antique store
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Maybe someone other than the mad hatter should have gone with him to the ER
He dared me to drink a bottle of olive oil in exchange for a 30 pack... So much for loosing the freshman fifteen this year.
Did you pour a hundred fucking pounds of sand in my car last night?
lol... you weighed it?
I think i'm going to homewreck at this Disney on Ice show.
I just realized that the first thing he ever bought me was Plan B.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
How many band members does it take to become The Band Slut? I think I might be dangerously close
Like I cant decide if he's like autistic or something or just seriously cock blocks himself on purpose with this shit
he was like captain planet, but less blue and more nakeed
Would you think less of me if I were eating pizza on the toilet right now?
she's throwing knives it scares me
update: broke ceiling. glass everywhere
Now all my porn is stored in my parents’ basement. It’s like a part of my soul is boxed up
Randomize