i just witnessed two asians having sex for the first time ten feet away from me..hes having a seizure..what the duck is going on???
It's hard to believe so much cum came out of such a small penis.
she's walking down the hall in a thong and one flip flop and one ugg
Hey, did you take me to hospital last night?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It's kind of hard to say bye to you when you fall asleep on the bar..
I totally cried the whole time and then screamed out my new therapists name....
Just walked into the bar to find a guy in a Boba Fett helmet leaning casually against the wall, texting. This night just got real.
If the egyptians can build pryamids men can walk on the moon and ron jeremy can sleep with all those bitches then we can finish these three handles of vodka
its like my brain is a tree and you are those little cookie elves
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Personally, I'm gonna be Sexy Dobby the House Elf.
I don't know which is worse, the fact that his name is Kevin or the fact that he has a pornstache.
The batteries in my vibrator died before I could finish. Which is a lot like my sex life lately......
last time we were there you stole a tap from the toilets. How are you confused that your bag is full of baubles you clearly can't stop collecting their furnishings
Its like your face is a pile of corn and I'm a chicken
...What??
Anyone who does not know who Paul McCartney is does NOT get to put hands in my pants
Randomize