And now we're talking about squeezing babies out of vaginas...
So I have to ask... did I meet your lumberjack expectations? I mean, minus the red flannel and all.
How am I supposed to spread my seed with you "modern women" and your birth control?
Yeah, that's not really a good thing. Especially for a girl. You should get a tattoo on your stomach that says "Please wear a condom".
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
yup, got lost on my way to the final. maybe i should have gone to this class all semester
we got hammered off table wine and i ended up biting my acrylic nail off so i could finger his butt.. ill never look at valentines day the same
They both invited me to family dinner Sunday. Secretly dating two sisters just got real.
Remind me never to take that much Vicodin ever again. I laid in bed measuring my heart rate for an hour and a half because I was afraid it would stop.
Just know I'm having fun but I still have my motor functions.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I decided it might be a good time to stop when he requested I "bring that pussy over here"
When you left the bar, you did two cartwheels and a heel click and RAN ALL THE WAY HOME.
Ps he swallowed my earring last night so yeah
Current status: so high that I'm unable to have coherent conversation with my mom, but still knew that when my dad said "shpritzy white stuff" I understood that he was trying to think of "whipped cream."
That text took me 10 minutes.
Oh. Why can't it be something easy, like a punch card for blowjobs?
i have a serious question for you... Why I am i not wearing any pants?
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