remember that time that crown gas station wouldn't sell us a lighter so we had to use matches and birthday candles to smoke with a toilet paper roll? sometimes i miss high school
What can i say im a girl who smells like weiners.
I even made an effort to dress like a conservative young lady who doesnt black out and throw up in her bed regularly today.
he saw my emergency pass-out-in-the-bathroom-after-drunken-puking cot in the bathroom.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you were the first one he came out to and you announced it as the finale while singing karaoke at the bar
just puked in a purse in the store. some girl asked if i was gonna buy it now and i laughed and asked her why id want a bag some dude just puked in. her face looked like she saw the devil.
After giving the pizza guy directions you told him to look for the big stupid looking kid outside in purple
Fucking freshmen need to learn how to puke in the bushes outside the dorm and not in the fucking elevator.
We don't have a lot of plans besides weed and cake
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I action rolled over a firepit. Twice. I am the action roll king
She just pulled out a chicken strip and a hundred dollar bill from her purse. This is a legit twentyfirst bday weekend.
On a scale of 1 to "bad descision", where does stealing my racist neighbors dog and giving him my roomates dildo for a chew toy rate?
I woke up and my pants were in the kitchen but my shoes were next to my bed. Do the math...
I threw up in my brother's Easter basket
sometime during the night he found me in the empty hotttub singing marvins room in only my bra.
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