my grand plan for the evening is to do shots of vodka til i cant anymore
I could swear I did coke with Jesus last night
Hello everyone will one of you please inform me on why I woke up in a cardboard recycle dumpster with no shirt and a stuffed animal? I want to hear this explanation.
Your godly.
I think we need to find a happy medium between fried food and dicks. This could end badly.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I thought i lost my bra, but when i went back to help clean it was hanging up on the wall
Matt. This is the manager of qdoba. Pick up the phone. Your friend needs you.
You went to the animal party as a hoodrat. You won the most creative costume contest.
The bachelor party was supposed to stay local but I think were in mexico.
While randomly hooking up with my neighbor last night he says "it's okay we're neighbors".
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I can't have my last hookup before 21 have been behind a dumpster
lmao he sent me a snapped but i'm afraid to open.
i think i have dick pic PTSD.
Got arrested last night. My cell mate just added me on Facebook.
I get so sad when I watch him slowly destroy his life with whiskey and cocaine. Then he bites my neck and I just want to fuck him. I can't help it.
He has me blocked on facebook.... so I stalked him using my cats fan page.
Just learned a very valuable life lesson. Never motorboat a cat when they have claws.
Randomize