This girl is more easily done than said...
Someone wrote that you're a whore in one of the bathroom stalls
I didn't know I was popular enough to be hated. This is awesome
Like if there was an award for best way to take a girls virginity, he would get a standing ovation. And first prize. Probably a bunch of roses too. That good.
You rubbing siracha on a cat with your feet is the opposite of what I want.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Why is your name written on my hand surrounded by hearts and a bartenders phone number?
Ita all starting to make sense i need vodka like i need air
I attempted to stand up and was quickly reminded by gravity that I am the universe's bitch right now
I'm watching a man in drag spread food products on his face my life is spiraling out of control.
Just keep in mind that she didn't start telling you you had the largest penis she had ever seen until AFTER she found out about your multi-million-dollar trust fund.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I've been really sick the past 4 days. Last night, I actually turned down a bj. I may be dying.
My saturday night consisted of sewing my Halloween costume and watching Blues Clues
You actually...sewed your costume?
I googled my name and pictures of you drinking showed up. Way to steal my thunder....
Does it look too obvious if I buy wine and candles!?! In my defense there is a gigantic snow storm coming.
Can I come kidnap you from work so we can chug mimosas? My little brother has a ski mask I can borrow.
Never going back to jail again. Only time in my life I've ever had a wet dream about jerking it...
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