He has some good qualities. Beneath the layers of asshole and fat.
How was I supposed to know she would get offended when I asked her how long it took to draw on her eyebrows.
I woke up with the wrong plaid-shirted guy in my bed.
it felt like a thousand fairies were licking my balls.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
They live so far away from me that not fucking them both would have been financially irresponsible
I'm not sure...it could be the pasta I ate from her sink, the dominoes, or just the alcohol. Or a wicked combination of all 3.
Do you know what's great about Canada?..... There will always be a Tim Hortons on my walk of shame route
Why is there a blood-covered "sorry about your stuff" note stapled to my door?
He ate me out on the balcony. My asian neighbors cats are judging me...ALL 3 OF THEM!!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Sorry but i am wayy to hungover to take mom to her AA meeting.
Wont she be proud, Hailey.
the fact that i came three times was completely negated by the fact that he high-fived himself after.
I mean, it's just pathetic when the standard is tinder and he can't live up to it.
Drunk sperm are not productive sperm.
Stop letting me drink while doing my makeup. I think I used sharpie for eyeliner.
I just saw a guy walking up the stairs with his dick out his pants. I let him know, and he just looked down in shock, laughed, and continued walking up the stairs.
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