I thought the fact that I took home a 42 year old with 3 kids would excuse my tardiness this morning because my boss is also 42 and has 3 kids. Boy was I wrong.
When she gives birth, I'm so playing 'Eye of the Tiger'
They don't exactly give out small business loans to start-up dealers
I have Retrograde Ejaculation as a side effect from one of my meds. Is this a respectable form of birth control?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He said he was going to "rock my world". I wonder if he too has a false sense of confidence and accomplishment stemming from a complete lack of honesty from our own female counterparts.
Dude your not gonna get by security covered in blood wearing only a robe
Don't worry I'm drunk they won't say anything
I can't be here...my therapist just watched me take tequila shots
I apparently used the line "I'm a bouncer too so i would know if I were too drunk" then they asked me to leave.
ok NEVER tell the strippers its your birthday. i think i have to burn these clothes and take a bath in bleach
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
When I watch porn and jerk off like 95% of the time Iron Chef is on in the background...
he played intl players anthem 4me and ate a strawberry out of my pussy
I also farted in bed this morning and said, "I don't even care. My body deserves that."
Are u alive? If u are, you deserve an award.
That’s true love. If they recognize a chocolate mold of your anus.
My purse is full of condoms and money.
I like where this is going...
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