How did people poop without Blackberrys?
Motorola Razers?
Stone age, man.
all they had in the fridge was rum and filled water balloons
Just tried on my bathing suit for the first time this year. Had to drink a beer to numb the pain.
I'm going to write a letter. It's going to say, Dear Every Girl Ever: Take some goddam initiative and wake me up with a blowjob and I will eat out of your hand. Love, Every Guy Ever
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
& he told me 'I don't think ur a big slut-just kind of an average slut'
HE THINKS THATS A COMPLIMENT!!!!!
Are my feet made of real feet?
oh my god i'm in a crawl space
She showed me her tits and my first thought was "I want these to feed my future children." I'm scared.
But like now I know, men who are vegetarians are significantly worse in bed.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Whenever you have to pee or whatever I'll be over here to harass you
What's the polite way to say "hey I don't actually want to fuck you, I just swiped right on you because you didn't like me in high school and I needed validation"
Would you be so kind as to inform your husband that my truck is forever cursed by mashed potatoes and it's his fault.
You burped in your shoe and whispered 'you're mine now'
I should buy myself lingerie for Valentine’s Day instead of a present for you because I am the present
He woke me with blue berry pancakes and a blow job. He's a keeper.
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