$35 all you can drink last night. Friend 1 woke up in a hotel lounge, friend 2 pissed himself and woke up wearing friend 1's spare pants, and my toilet indicates I threw up extensively.
My booty call said shes done doing the walk of shame. Wtf is that?
It's what anyone that sleeps with you, specifically, does when they leave. Some do it even when they just think of you.
I was in a gas station that sold tazers and I just saw a billboard that said "Strippers, need we say more?" God I love Georgia!
i hope chris hansen doesn't have a boat
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he refused to get me toilet paper before we started drinking so I keep wiping with his towel.
So one buddy got tackled at the urinals by national guard members and was arrested. Another had sex in a port o potty with possibly the drunkest girl I've ever encountered. The rest of us blacked out and won a few bets. So yes, the derby did meet our expectations.
You. Me. Frosting and a bed. Lets do this.
Well if you're drunk enough to make some mistakes this week I'd be down to redeem myself for my poor performance.
I feel like I have to sign a death waver before I have sex with him...
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At the very least, I mastered a nap while occasionally being dry humped.
The boob job was worth every penny just to see the expression of pure joy on his face the first time he saw them.
He totally fucked me in his Chewbacca socks
I'm drunk but I just ate 2 heads of broccoli so does that mean it evens out?
Yes absolutlely
Don't do it. It's 9 am on a Monday morning and I'm hungover. I can't deal with tears right now.
and eventually we just all took our pants off
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