I told u I don't really remember everything lol i pretty much remember not lasting as long as I norm and that I wore a condom, I hate condoms
Vibrating panties would be amazing during this conversation!
Are you seriously drinking already? It's 11AM. Still morning.
I'm going by McDonald's time. And since they stop serving breakfast at 10:30 and start serving lunch, it is now afternoon.
I told my new friends about my possible new chin. They said I should get my nose done first. Please tell me I'm pretty or something.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
its like think what a normal person would think but completely the opposite.
i'm not the one sitting naked in my room playing with my boobs and a cat.
I just dropped off shoes at Mike's hotel. The chick he hooked up with last night stole his phone and shoes.
Chicken wings don't come back up an through your nose as easily as you'd think
He either works for the Irish Mob or I'm being Catfished
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It felt as if we were fucking on a sea of baby feet and morgan freemans face hair
I went from naked with lasts nights hookup to Ihop in 6 minutes flat
I think that's a new house record
Other than my penis smelling like an ashtray, it went really well.
He's two decades older than you. Remember how you said you wish you lived in the 70s? HE DID.
I think I gotta smoke less weed, I'm getting to lazy to fuck my girlfriend
This is the third time I have overheard parents tell their children "don't be that girl" in reference to me. I'm either doing something horribly wrong or amazingly right
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