Dude I think you forgot how to talk last night. We kept asking if you wanted a condom and you just smiled and made weird noises...
I just did the nutritional comparison between 2% milk and Bud Light Lime.. the beer had less calories, less carbs, and less fat. It's not looking good for milk in my life anymore
Well I say she's a whore. All four of her kids have different last names.
BUT, one is Johnson and the other is Johnston. She gets some credit for that
He told me all about his plan for proposing to his girlfriend as pillow talk.
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im sorry but you know it was a good night when you got tasered on the ass and didnt even feel it
I can feel my moral fiber fraying.
She said she'll drive over, bang, and then head home. It's like ordering a pizza.
Is eating fries while lying on the floor bad for you?
If I choke and die at least I will have been doing something I love
The hint wasn't even a hint. it said "stop talking to her" that's pretty straightforward
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I think I'm in the negatives for the quantity of fucks given today.
Is it against health code to come into work half drunk and commando?
Hey! How are you feeling? Still preferring soup over sex?
My little sister just helped me edit my nudes so that's how my night is going
he made that chewbacca noise when he came. like father like son i guess.
You can come over but I have to warn you that it is naked Sunday.
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