When I saw him standing at full height, I realized exactly how much his body structure reminds me of his penis.
So when does "going out for one drink" = giving some guy an HJ on the sidewalk?!?
Woke up with a treasure map of my room stuck with sticky tape to my ceiling. followed it and found $75 with a note saying; "eat this if we're invaded"... I'm never getting stoned again
I just puked while everyone was releasing balloons. Im to hungover for this memoial service. Rest in peace great gramps.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
and you think what you did last night was bad? at least you didnt go wake up a sleeping guy for birthday sex.
Welcome to the first annual slutathon and let the men be ever in our favor
Hey man. We haven't met but my name is Ben. I threw up a bunch at your house last night. I heard you smoke though so I'll smoke you out anytime.
You should be glad you didn't come with last night. I watched pirate porn for the first time in my life as the 9th wheel.
He made the Waffle House lady get me out of the car. This isn't a joke.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The toilet wouldn't flush at the club so I literally just shat in the garbage.
Sensing a theme here
If alcoholism is a theme, yes.
Sext me about skeletons
The condoms have been found. I repeat: THE CONDOMS HAVE BEEN FOUND. he isn't a collector!!!
I'm glad that we laid to rest the suspicion that he was keeping them in a scrapbook. yayy
He did a backflip because drugs
we're tipping the strippers with chocolate coins.
Randomize