Texts From Last Night

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  (212): View more from New York

  so she proceeds to puke everywhere, look up at me like a sick dog, and then say, "i'll finish if you want me to."

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  (212): so she proceeds to puke everywhere, look up at me like a sick dog, and then say, "i'll finish if you want me to." http://tfl.nu/pyn2
  Replies (16) Good night (518) Bad night (1314) Order T-Shirt
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  (773): View more from Illinois

  My kitchen smells like failed pina coladas.

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  (773): My kitchen smells like failed pina coladas. http://tfl.nu/zv1j
  Replies (1) Good night (516) Bad night (806) Order T-Shirt
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  (562): View more from California

  I think we were cool up until the point where he saw that planned parenthood was on my speed dial.

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  (562): I think we were cool up until the point where he saw that planned parenthood was on my speed dial. http://tfl.nu/180u
  Replies (25) Good night (527) Bad night (4469) Order T-Shirt
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  (847): View more from Illinois

  HAH. HARRY POTTER CASUAL CONVO HAS BEEN EXTENDED TO DISCUSSING WEATHER. SO PRO

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  (847): HAH. HARRY POTTER CASUAL CONVO HAS BEEN EXTENDED TO DISCUSSING WEATHER. SO PRO http://tfl.nu/vpr1
  Replies (34) Good night (2937) Bad night (967) Order T-Shirt
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  (315): View more from New York

  I think thanksgiving was created so we could all be thankful that we're still alive after the night before.

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  (315): I think thanksgiving was created so we could all be thankful that we're still alive after the night before. http://tfl.nu/hqeq
  Replies (23) Good night (4516) Bad night (512) Order T-Shirt
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  (617): View more from Massachusetts

  what date should I let him know how fucked up I am?

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  (617): what date should I let him know how fucked up I am? http://tfl.nu/6aws
  Replies (17) Good night (1152) Bad night (4059) Order T-Shirt
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  (512): View more from Texas

  I almost puked on my graduation application. perfect.

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  (512): I almost puked on my graduation application. perfect. http://tfl.nu/coze
  Replies (4) Good night (2376) Bad night (969) Order T-Shirt
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  (801): View more from Utah

  Thanks for putting pants on me last night. And for calling me a princess.

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  (801): Thanks for putting pants on me last night. And for calling me a princess. http://tfl.nu/8hwd
  Replies (8) Good night (3994) Bad night (843) Order T-Shirt
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  (775): View more from Nevada

  Don't ask how or why, but I think the 775 on the inside of my lip is permanent

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  (775): Don't ask how or why, but I think the 775 on the inside of my lip is permanent http://tfl.nu/ylaq
  Replies (6) Good night (555) Bad night (1107) Order T-Shirt
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  (715): View more from Wisconsin

  His pick up line was "your one sexy pumpkin, I'd love to carve." Why would you let me go home with him?

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  (715): His pick up line was "your one sexy pumpkin, I'd love to carve." Why would you let me go home with him? http://tfl.nu/r9a3
  Replies (21) Good night (1166) Bad night (1541) Order T-Shirt
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  (918): View more from Oklahoma

  Looking at an apartment in Houston. It's right beside my favorite bar and the zoo. Best or worst decision?

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  (918): Looking at an apartment in Houston. It's right beside my favorite bar and the zoo. Best or worst decision? http://tfl.nu/w6zq
  Replies (9) Good night (2597) Bad night (392) Order T-Shirt
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  (+44): View more from United Kingdom

  You know I told you about that hammering at 3 AM yesterday? Turns out it was Holly beating the lock out of her door with a mallet because she'd forgotten her keys.

  (1+44): View more from

  Doesn't she keep a spare?

  (+44): View more from United Kingdom

  Drunk Holly doesn't listen to Sober Holly's plans.

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  (+44): You know I told you about that hammering at 3 AM yesterday? Turns out it was Holly beating the lock out of her door with a mallet because she'd forgotten her keys. (1+44): Doesn't she keep a spare? (+44): Drunk Holly doesn't listen to Sober Holly's plans. http://tfl.nu/5sic
  Replies (7) Good night (2505) Bad night (690)
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  (503): View more from Oregon

  Ack! That is the first dick pic I've ever received. A) congrats B) that is way grosser than I ever thought t would be.

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  (503): Ack! That is the first dick pic I've ever received. A) congrats B) that is way grosser than I ever thought t would be. http://tfl.nu/kby8
  Replies (5) Good night (472) Bad night (1038) Order T-Shirt
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  (508): View more from Massachusetts

  Note to self...boner negates all verbal agreements ...got it

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  (508): Note to self...boner negates all verbal agreements ...got it http://tfl.nu/qcg9
  Replies (3) Good night (318) Bad night (267) Order T-Shirt
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  (507): View more from Minnesota

  Remember when we were coked out at that house and we were trying to meditate in the bathroom? Who's house were we at?

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  (507): Remember when we were coked out at that house and we were trying to meditate in the bathroom? Who's house were we at? http://tfl.nu/qw84
  Replies (7) Good night (390) Bad night (172) Order T-Shirt

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