I hate it when hot girls behave. It's so anticlimactic
bet u 5 dollars u can't guess were i woke up this morning
oh god.. jail?
better, on the catwalk of the auditorium
He doesn't know I'm infertile yet, that's when the sex gets good
You know you're deprived when the only thing you taste while chewing gum is the 2 grams of sugar alcohol.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I know i'm the slutty cousin, but be honest. have you ever got your nose ring caught on a guy's zipper?
someone needs to get her out of the garbage can shes never gonna forgive us for this
Apparently I grabbed her ponytail and cut it with an exacto knife.
Just been one of those weeks where alcohol out weighs friendship
My new hangover cure is going for a haircut, just so the stylists give me a scalp massage during the shampoo.
That certainly explains the nine times your hair has looked different just this last month alone.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Yea I almost drowned giving a BJ in the shower once
CODE RED CODE RED MY VIBRATOR IS BROKEN THIS IS NOT A DRILL
Just don't let me do two things: Beer bongs filled with vodka or shot competitions
hey sorry i didnt call i just got out of jail, so you still dtf ?
Well, if you do die, I'll bedazzle your coffin.
That confirms what we've all known all along. I'm a bad gay. I have no fashion sense.
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