I'm really into asian looking animals
I Once took so much Ecstacy that I tried to hug a fire.
he was fingering me to the beat of a lady gaga song. new high? new low? i don know, but i came, so whatever.
Why are there hot girls at the dollar store?
The recession has changed everything man.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
she's just sitting in a corner ripping all of the filters off her menthols
the only thing i can think of after seeing avatar is "when are they gonna make avatar porn?"
Washing the last semen-stained shirt you have really solidifies a breakup. It just got real.
I'm at the grocery store buying monistat and corn nuts. thank god for self check out.
Wedding update: no alcohol, 75% of people have left, no one is dancing, no single groomsmen, and it's 5:30. I'm going the fuck home to drink by myself.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
told weddin planner we wanted to work in ceremonial body shots before vows. she hasnt reponded yet...
That was the second worst thing to happen to my asshole.
There has been a song made about you fucking his roommate.
It's destiny.
I'm not snubbing your weed I just had a really important rack of ribs to get home to
We need a kiddie pool and lots of cornstarch
Basically, I am an endless fountain of unconvential sexual experiences and knowledge.
Randomize