I just pynch a tree in the face
I just saw a man with a full beard and frosted tips
there is no god
Just saw an old lady trip and stumble. Laughed. Kept Driving. I'm going to hell.
he drunkenly confessed to whacking off before coming over so the sex'd be longer. this one's a keeper
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
how can i incorporate a boy scout uniform into what i do tonight?
he was gone before i woke up. left a pee stain, phone number, note and $20 for sheets. safe to say i will not be calling.
I told him I had AIDS after he bit me. His dad cried. I think I just ruined the little guy's 3rd birthday, but he had in coming.
Someone's having a good night if they're getting gummi bears and Astroglide.
He tried to spell out "PROM?" in his cum on my stomach during sex. It was terrible
well did you say yes?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
No. I'm laying on the floor naked. I almost made it to the shower
This could be the definition of living by yourself
He has what he calls a "Ben Franklin". It's a pubic hairdo based on the man himself; long on the sides and bald in the middle.
Went to the lab to print and realized the guy next to me was the one we stole all the beer from last night..... Oops
Hey I need you to run the morning meeting, for reasons I can explain when I find out where I left my car
Whatever you wanna call it i just wanna get railed tonight
Hhhaaa He said Peanutburter disinfect lol. Like peanut butter can disinfect stuff. None of those guys are safe
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