He asked me to sit on his face, but i didnt, for 2 reasons, one, i had just pooped like 20 mins before sex, and two, this could be my future husband. so i skipped on sitting.
The tent neighbors already set us on fire w an errant roach. How do you think Bonnaroo's going?!
i seriously wanted to pee on her right then.
Hes stumbling drunkenly around the streets of New York with a balloon vagina on his head. I'd say hes having a good night.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
drunk her ninja stole one of the pizzas as it arrived and hid all of the pieces in a cereal box in the fridge.Genius.
Chill out, I'm getting ready as fast as I can. I didn't even masturbate in the shower.
Not only have I fallen off the wagon, it ran me over and just kept going...
You took my underwater blowjob virginity.
My family will be here in an hour and I'm deciding between doing my makeup or saying fuck it and wearing what's left of last night's...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Dad danced with a girl half his age and her boyfriend just sat at the bar and waited for dad to be done. I bought pity nachos.
40 year old guy made out with me last night while I had French fries in my mouth
She was dressed as a banana and told me that I needed more potassium in my diet. Of course I went down on her.
All this studying of HIV makes me want to have sex with you.
Having to do the walk of shame on crutches was defiently a first for me. cheers to the governor, klove
he's spending the night tonight. if i can walk straight tomorrow i'll be pissed.
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