Note to self. Never fart in a tanning bed
so my dad walked in on us having sex
lulz really? why?
lets just say he wont be answering to 'daddy' for a loooooong time
homeboy just tried to sext with me at 8:30 in the morning while I was on a job interview...
so you did it...
obv...but still...it was inconsiderate.
she was pretty happy for someone in the middle of a herpes outbreak, how was i supposed to know?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It was like getting head from an anaconda
Fuck. The basement bathroom I've been getting head in for 6 months just went 'Out of Service'.
My dad and I just got asked if "we wanted a more intimate setting for our date". The world is coming to an end.
I fucked her wearing an American flag. Now here I am, awake, naked, and flag less. How do I report this to the police?
I'm a bit offended I got no nudies back but it's whatever
They're in the mail. Snapchats too fast. I want the suspense.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just found out two girls I dated met each other, bonded over how much they hate me, started dating and are gonna get married soon.
I think it's safe to assume that dad heard you lose your lesbian virginity last night
If a clean cut ginger with a flannel and tattoos shows up at the apartment, he is allowed inside.
My mom just said we can't get married in nude body suits to look like earthworms. She's ruining my life.
WHY DOES MY BOYFRIEND'S BROTHER HAVE TO BE SO FUCKING HOT
I can't wait to see you again. It will be like when we first started dating- but with less clothes.
Randomize