If immigrants and dwarves find love, why can't I?
Guys who wear capris make me want to kill endangered species.
we better have passed that bar exam - i dont want to have to drink like this again
Henry's handball, Tiger Wood's Car Crash, Roger Federer losing ... That's it....I'm throwing my Gillete away
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Omg i either met the gayest dude ever or my next boyfriend
Maybe someone other than the mad hatter should have gone with him to the ER
Just used my boobs as a ramp to guide ramen into my mouth.
She kicked in my bedroom door in only high-heals with a bottle of wine, announcing it was "cock-o-clock"
Im gonna take a shit then figure out how to be better at basketball
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Well, somebody (me) put on reindeer antlers, crawled around on the floor, and meowed at people... So yeah, I'd say it was "one of those nights"
you're right. i am beautiful. like a May day. frolicking in a meadow of wildflowers. platinum in one hand. pipe in the other. that kind of beautiful.
As if finding out the man you just had sex with is married isn't bad enough, it gets so much more awkward when his wife comes in to comfort you...
we need to find a way to be drinking champagne 24/7
I didn't know that all of his brothers would be hot and musical too. That's a dick move on behalf of biology.
I would like to make it known to all of you that my penis is official retired, but it thanks you for the countless years of service you provided
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