I wannas sexs uuuuu
just caught my little brother jacking off the family pet
I wish i could convert my hornyness to productiveness. I would have written a fucking book by now.
For some reason 'start yourself on fire drunk' isn't nearly as funny after last 4th of july..
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
When are you comin back?
probably mid next week, depending on when i finish my remaining half gallons
She had the hiccups when she was giving me head. It was actually pretty awesome
I got pulled into the conversation by "she sleeps with everybody" then "she" involved sleeping with "cocks the size of a viva burrito"
I think i'm going to homewreck at this Disney on Ice show.
If this nail lady pinches my achilles one more time im kicking her directly in her bedazzled boobs
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just wish I had a snapshot of his attempted front flip off the bar. There are some things that are worth getting a life ban for, and the moment of impact with his foot and that lady's face was one of those things.
One eye has cum in it and the other has sunscreen
summertime
I hope you have irresponsible drunk insurance because you're about to pay a deductible
I can't go to the bars anymore. She wanted to see me again and I drunkenly told her I was moving today. If she spots me I'm fucked.
I came so hard I went blind for a few seconds.
dollar rum and cokes, see you on the dark side of infinity
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