You think ghandi was good in the sack? cuz i sure do.
I'm not gay.
Soooo you want ghandi? is that what your telling me?
If ghandi gives good head...I'm in
Its fine.
I don't usually arrange sex via text message
and all i could think about was how mcdonalds would not be open anymore after we were done having sex
Hey do you have anything at your house 30 ft. tall to throw eggs off of?
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she made a facebook for her toddler.. his likes include lil wayne and ice luge. He has more friends than i do. I mean, Seriously? there's not enough booze in the world to make thanksgiveing bearable
She's doing hand stands on the train as I type. Idk if I'm impressed it embarrassed. Or turned on.
Nothing quite like walking through a spider web on your way back in from smoking to fuck up a perfectly good high.
she pointed to my dick and said you are going to save the world
Why are we so great
Like I'm def going to a therapist but I wouldn't change a thing about us except maybe the peeing
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I didn't have cash to pay cover at the bar, so I traded the bouncer a Krispy Kreme doughnut i had in my purse
I mean honestly, what would you have done?
Not screw her in the church house?
On another note I never thought having a drug addicted stalker would prove useful
Why in the hell is there a guy dressed up as a horse passed out in our kitchen.
happy birthday!
we went book shopping, so yes this relationship is going to be about more than sex
He's such a jerk. If only his penis was attached to someone else
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