Cure to hiccups..road head..high five
When health care reform is passed, I'm throwing a kegger
You are the reason we need health care reform
you know that dress I got margarita and puke on? yeah, just returned it.
That's why there are breakfast margaritas.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Romer got arrested for getting in a bar fight with a bus boy because he was trying to steal a keg, had it all the way to the car
According to the bell hop, we stumbled in about 4 and then cannon balled into the pool.
You have not lived until you've seen your mother stumble into the house with one shoe on mumbling incoherently about tequila cupcakes.
I'm slightly possesive over the gucamole when i'm stoned.
Is that why you left peanut shells in my bed?
my revenge plans when i'm high are never as good as i think they are
Her stepmother interrupted our sex to tell her it was midnight and she wanted to do a sympathy shot for her 50th.
Don't break up.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just had Jager bombs for breakfast with her roommate... I do not regret this newfound lesbianism.
It sounded like he said "don't stop" but all I could hear were his balls.
I keeping finding meatballs in random places
i am craving dick and cupcakes
my night went from a boring school play to hotboxing a car with 3 criminals
So naked ping pong was a mistake... Looks like we were attacked by an octopus.
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