It was like doing yoga with his dick in me
She tried to keep her legs crossed last night while doing a keg stand. Way to keep it classy.
Blonde 1 is sitting on the floor crying and blonde 2 is asleep with her face in the toilet. This isn't what I had in mind when they asked me back
We started snorting MDMA at 3 in the afternoon...it was never going to end well.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
that's like... drinking popov and saying its the worlds best vodka. you gotta try some others first. THERE SHOULD BE A MISS AMERICA PAGEANT. but like, mr penis. and they can do tricks and make unintelligent remarks and wear sparkly condoms.
Dating Detox Day 5: had to go out and buy new batteries. this may be harder than I thought
Safe to say I relapsed into my old chatroulette drunk flashing days.
The effect you have on my penis from a different state is impressive
Hope you had your fill for the summer my friend, because all the cleavage has been put away for the winter. Fear not; it blooms again in May.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Laying on a pile of just out of the dryer clothes because this is NOT real life.
You will bone me until my eyeballs fall out. This is not a request.
Matched with the lumberjack. Here's your wedding invite.
2016 shall be rememered as the year I sharted while putting up the Christmas tree.
Are you really trying to argue your case that you seduced my cat?
i don't care if you are my best friend. does not give you the right to describe how well my sister gives blowjobs.
how about your cousin?
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