Turns out you're obligated under man law to share any passwords you may have for porno sites
Is that what they're teaching u at that bar review class?
Not everyone can get ass. Some people are good at building rockets. You’re good at sleeping with many men. It’s an art.
Well, you're either very drunk or very high but I'll let it slide because I love any type of conversation concerning cheese.
and ill be dreaming of you. not in a creepy way, but in an inappropriate way
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I was so proud to be driving sober that I wanted to get pulled over so I could tell the officer I hadn't been drinking.
I will call him whatever I please, including flaccid dick on forehead guy but not limited to watermelon cunt head.
Good morning! Just thought I'd give you my yearly reminder that we lost our virginities 7 years ago, yesterday.
That's the best creepy text ever.
He's under the table sobbing because he doesn't live in a taco if you ever get him this high again I will stab you
You finished the fifth and then hid two dozen eggs around your apartment and declare that you would "quest for Jesus". Have fun questing today.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just blew a guy who had the same phone case as me. It was destiny.
Opened the browser on my phone to a web search for midget birth rates per capita. A good night.
We can't shop at Hobby Lobby anymore. They don't like Plan B which basically runs through our veins.
There was pot, but there are no Doritos, no Funyons, no Oreos.
Send help.
Its like the floor is slow but life is fast?
I see you found the nyquil...
the guy in front of me in walmart is buying a blowtorch, potato chips, and condoms. I'm curious and horrified at the same time.
Randomize